Bombing of Columbus

The Bombing of Columbus was a large-scale Nuclear tragedy that occurred near the beginning of the META war. General Reggie Fils-Aime led the MTO's army, whilst the opposing side's Corporal Wallace Breen continued on with his violent Scorched Cock Policy, a trail of pain which began from his deployment in Washington D.C. It consisted of the burning and preparing of the male genetalia in a way similar to that of the popular American sausage food, Hot Dogs. In an effort to preserve more men's livelihoods, General Fils-Aime made the difficult decision to withdraw from Columbus; they retreated to Cleveland. From there, he ordered his troops to release the Nuclear Pumpkin. After the detonation, a massive rainbow sighting was reported by the Pennsylvania Mad Men.

The Titanic III
The deadly Nuclear Pumpkin destroyed the entire city, causing such damage that Lake Erie expanded to combine with Lake Michigan, the two converging on the newly formed Columbus Bay. This newly formed radioactive dystopian marshland gave rise to the PETA Naval Terrorism Headquarters. The Titanic III was constructed in Lake Huron and sent to Columbus, to be used as this new HQ. The warship was equipped with Anti-Male laser technology a few weeks after its creation. Shortly thereafter, it was equipped with titanium alloy tank treads. The Ironclad of the East, as they called it, became notorious for creeping over hills, like a Jawa Sandcrawler, and shooting Meat substitutes and alternatives into their enemies with deadly force (See the Massacre at Ottawa).